Things we should be grateful for

Today‘s post will be short but hopefully meaningful. I have been trying to incorporate more gratitude practices in my life. These have been popular for many years and, as always, there are many ways to do so. Today, I propose one inspired by the Japanese naikan practice. It‘s up to you to read it and decide if such an exercise is suitable to your taste.

Typically, naikan focuses on three questions:

• What was I given by others?
• What did I give to others?
• What problems did I cause to others?

Let me try to generally follow that structure. In any case, let‘s begin.

What was I given?

We could always concern ourselves with material gain, but there is so much more that we are given every single day. Here are some of mine.

I am grateful for the time my family gives me. Day or night, I can always count on them to eat together, reassure my concerns and celebrate my successes. Always with a smile too. I simply need to mention the countless services they gave me: meals, lift but - above all - their time. In a disconnected world, we never bicker (for long at least) and stick together. That is something that I might have taken for granted and should recognize just how marvellous it is while I have it.

I am grateful for my health. Why? Simply because I don‘t have anything to mourn about. Fortunately, pain and sickness are not part of my daily schedule. I can move, I can breathe, I can see, I can hear and I can think. I recognize that not everyone can appreciate life as fully as I can. Let me be grateful for what I have.

I am grateful for my city. It might not have everything, the public transport might not be the best and there are problems here and there. Nevertheless, I can live peacefully. It is not overcrowded. It is clean. People are helpful. Scarcity and sadness are not commonplace. We have services. We have food. I have a place to live and that is more than many can hope. Let me be grateful for this too.

I am grateful for the time I live in. As always, our modern world has some problems but, frankly, problems will always be present. We should be grateful that our problems are, most of the time, less threatening than what people a hundred years ago (heck - even fifty) saw every day. We must take time to appreciate our technology. I am writing this post on a device nearly impossible fifty years before putting it on the web, another concept completely unimaginable previously. I have access to water and electricity pretty much on command. I can connect to anyone or search any library in a matter of seconds. Wow.

I am grateful for the time I had. Of course, I cannot guess how much time is left for me here, but I strive to finish everyday contempt that it would be my last. After all, while still young, I have already outlasted many before me. I have no major quarrel to leave behind. I make sure to leave as many people as I can on good terms. I appreciate the things I did, the experiences I lived and the moments I shared. Of course, I have projects, experiences and people I want to interact with tomorrow. Yet, I feel contempt. Let me be grateful for that too.

What did I give to others?

I strive to give every day whenever I can and to whoever is there for it. Here are some recent examples. This is not to brag - it‘s a personal reflection.

• I gave books to my local library and social center.
• I gave my bag to my sister‘s cat (he loves it).
• I gave a present to one of my friends last week (for no particular reason apart from being glad to share time with him).
• I try to give homemade meals every month to my friends and family.
• And, of course, I try every day to give as much time and joy as I can to people I hold dear. My family, my friends, my colleagues but also strangers on the road.

I also recognize that we can always give more and that we probably should try more too.

What problems did I cause?

This question will be hard for anyone. I will do what I can.

I consider communication the biggest source of problems I cause to others. I recognize that whatever I do, there will be differences between what I think, what I say, what is heard and what is understood. I have caused many grievances to friends, family and colleagues while I think we had the same thing in mind. Communication was always a challenge for me and I know that I am not alone in this. Yet, I work tirelessly every day to be more mindful, accurate and clear even though perfection will never happen.

I recognize that I have caused problems to my family - changing the schedule sometimes at the last moment. Yet, they always accept it and go with the flow. I can only be amazed by that.

I recognize that I have sometimes caused problems to strangers by not openly offering my aid to them. I still sometimes do not recognize when people need help even though they might not want to express it out loud. I am also working on being better at that.

I am grateful

Yes, I am grateful for you too. Time and interest are the most precious resources we have. That you openly share it with my (silly) writings warms my heart. Thank you.

Now, it might be your turn. Remember that grateful practice is just that: practice. It doesn‘t have to be perfect, it doesn‘t have to be complex. It just has to be done.

On that, have a nice day.